What To Do When Gratitude Doesn’t Work

What To Do When Gratitude Doesn’t Work

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I used to hate the word gratitude. But then again, I hate most things that become cliché. But I also know that every cliché has truth. Absence makes the heart grow fonder. Actions speak louder than words. Balloons make you smile. Read any article on happiness and success tips and at the top is always […]

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The One Question You Should Never Have To Ask While On A Date

The One Question You Should Never Have To Ask While On A Date

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Dating. It can get freakin’ crazy town up in here. One thing has been coming up a lot lately in conversations with clients and friends is the idea of first dates. And what I realized is that the one question that you never want to have to ask on a date: “So, is this a […]

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The One Trick To Stop Comparing Yourself to Others

The One Trick To Stop Comparing Yourself to Others

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One of my most annoying self-defeating habits is comparing myself to others. Other coaches. Other men. Other writers. Other entrepreneurs. Other couples. Other dancers. I’m not going to sit here and say that I’ve totally gotten rid of that habit, either. It might always be there to some degree. I’m ok with that. If you […]

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2 Reasons Why You Are Invisible To The Opposite Sex

2 Reasons Why You Are Invisible To The Opposite Sex

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There are two simple things you’re doing that make you invisible to the opposite sex. And everyone, actually. It doesn’t really matter what your sexual orientation, culture or shoe size is. A lot of people talk about the basics of dating and relationships. Love yourself first. Make a list of the kind of partner you […]

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Why Playing It Safe Isn’t Sexy

Why Playing It Safe Isn’t Sexy

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Looking back over my life, there were moments where I played it too safe with women. Where I waited for a clear invitation before I moved forward. Where I hid or mildly expressed my true desires and feelings for fear of being rejected. Where I basked in the safe certainty of the status quo than […]

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11 Ways Salsa Dancing Made Me A Better Man

11 Ways Salsa Dancing Made Me A Better Man

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I used to dance for hours alone in my room to Bobby Brown and Father MC. As a quiet kid, hanging out solo with my Sony dual cassette boombox was how I kept my self busy in between school dances. But partner dancing always scared me. I didn’t want to dance with anyone. I wanted […]

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10 Ways To Destroy Your Mojo

10 Ways To Destroy Your Mojo

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Growing up, I was a shy, quiet, nerdy little dude with pimples. And for some reason, as scrawny as I was as a kid, I insisted on wearing extra-large t-shirts. My mojo was, you could say, not that strong.  As if that wasn’t enough, I also picked up a couple of habits that helped me […]

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6 Ways to Create Juicier Connections With Women (And Anyone)

6 Ways to Create Juicier Connections With Women (And Anyone)

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I used to be a horrible listener. I was so afraid of what a woman thought of me that I was always in my head trying to micromanage the entire conversation. I would stutter. I asked dumb things like “What is your favorite kind of horse?” Now, as a life and authentic relating coach, circling facilitator and […]

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Do You Give Up Too Easily?

Do You Give Up Too Easily?

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Let’s say I want to go to on a safari in Kenya.  It would be total sweetness for me to take a non-stop flight from Washington, DC straight onto a little landing strip next to my safari hut. But there isn’t. And the reality is, so what?  The only question is: Where am I and […]

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Maybe They ARE That Into You

Maybe They ARE That Into You

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There are too many times to even bother counting. “She was only talking to me because she was bored while she waited for her friends.” “The only reason she hooked up with me is because I’m American, and I stand out here in Brazil.” “If I didn’t dance well, she wouldn’t be interested in me.” […]

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Why Regardless Is A Powerful Word

Why Regardless Is A Powerful Word

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When left unobserved, my mind can play tricks on me.  The biggest trick it plays is the one where it makes me believe the lame excuses of why my future is limited or why my current reality won’t ever change.  One thing I’ve been playing with lately is the word regardless. re·gard·less Adverb: Without paying attention […]

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Wanna Find Love? Let Go Of The Banana

Wanna Find Love? Let Go Of The Banana

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Are you keeping a few friends or acquaintances on your radar as potential hookups or relationship material? Is your ex on your backup list? Are you still pining over your college crush? Well, if you want a new relationship, you’ve got to cut them loose. If that cute friend you secretly have the hots for […]

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Can NOT Dating Improve Your Dating?

Can NOT Dating Improve Your Dating?

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Spring is here. Nine of your friends are getting married in June. You’ve had way too many first dates pick their nose and/or fart in the past two months. Your last five online dates have simply fizzled for no apparent reason. So it’s fair to say your current vibe about dating isn’t exactly positive. Whatever […]

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500 Dates Of Bummer

500 Dates Of Bummer

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Is dating a numbers game?  Is it really about just going out and dating tons of people until you find a match?  If that’s your approach, and it feels good and true to you, then keep on truckin’.  If, however, you’re having some frustration or lack of success with that approach, then I invite you to […]

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Your Soulmate WANTS You To Be Single

Your Soulmate WANTS You To Be Single

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A shift in perspective is a powerful thing. Every now and then I’ll hear someone complain about being single. Usually a story about how they’re some kind of social pariah or less of a person because they’re still single while all their friends are getting married and popping out babies. I’ve heard it from both […]

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